


The Hero, the Prince and the Figure Skater

by kakera



Category: Ouran High School Host Club - All Media Types, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime), ワンパンマン | One-Punch Man
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Embarrassing Your Partner In Public, Gift Fic, M/M, Public Love Shouting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 08:50:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11870826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakera/pseuds/kakera
Summary: Also known as, "A Hero, a Prince and a Figure Skater Walk Into a Park..."Saitama thought it was a good idea to go to the park in the evening.Saitama was wrong, and as he prepares to be thoroughly embarrassed by his boyfriend, he finds out he is not alone.





	The Hero, the Prince and the Figure Skater

**Author's Note:**

> Written a a birthday fic for my lovely friend Deme, based on a dream she had, which sounded totally wild.   
> This whole 'public love shouting' is totally a thing, there's a video of it on YouTube [right here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=neV-5HZVdg4).

Saitama thought it was a good idea to go to the park in the evening. Thought it would be quieter, since it was dark and kind of cold, and that fewer people would recognise Genos strolling along the shadowy pathways.

Saitama was wrong.

The park was bustling and noisy, bright lights illuminating the pathways and viewpoints, stands and kiosks here and there selling various kinds of food and beverages.

And of course, people recognised Genos.

Saitama didn't _mind_ , as such. It was great that the guy got some attention.

It would just be even greater if it didn't interrupt their....well, their _date_.

Saitama couldn't remember the last time they went on a date. Normally their outings involved fighting monsters or shopping for groceries, which hardly counted. Dates happened so rarely that they were still more or less a new thing for them, months down the line.

...Genos could probably tell him the exact number of dates, and the exact number of days (and hours, minutes and seconds) since their last one. He was obsessively accurate over details like that.

All Saitama knew was that it had been _ages_ and this walk through the park was supposed to be relaxing after their All You Can Eat Buffet (they'd stuffed themselves stupid; he _needed_ the walk).

But they'd barely walked at all, because fans kept stopping Genos to ask for photos, and Genos - following Saitama's 'advice' from months ago - was being polite to them.

Saitama was beginning to regret giving that advice. Genos looked like he regretted taking it, because he smiled with gritted teeth, and his gaze was full of irritation.

The park had been a terrible idea. They should have just wandered the city instead.

Saitama was about to suggest that they left when someone bumped into him.

"Isn't a commoner's park exciting!" A high schooler shouted out to his gaggle of followers, not seeming to notice that he'd knocked against someone. Saitama might have thought him foreign if not for how naturally he spoke Japanese: the boy's blond hair seemed to shine under the lights, and his blue eyes were wide with hyperactive merriment as he pranced along the path.

"Oi!" Saitama was in no mood to put up with rudeness, especially considering these kids were dressed up in obscenely expensive-looking clothing for going to a park, and were observing people as though they were animals at the zoo.

One of the boys - short brown hair and worn out clothes that suggested some level of normality - stopped and bowed to Saitama.

"I am so sorry for my senpai! He's an idiot."

"Haruhi~!" The blond boy called out.

The brunette sighed and trailed off.

"That boy was rude, Saitama-sensei." Genos was at Saitama's side now, glaring in the direction of the high-schoolers. "And that girl should have waited for you to accept her apology on behalf of her rude senpai."

Saitama blinked. "That was a girl?"

"It was obvious..." Genos fixed Saitama with one of his intense stares. "Sensei. Whilst they are distracted, let's continue."

Saitama looked across to the girls who had until now been fawning over Genos, and saw that they were now fawning over the group of high-schoolers instead, huddled together and muttering things like, 'princes!' and 'how cute!' and 'forbidden love!'

"...Yeah," he said, wanting to get away from them. "Let's head on."

They continued along the path, chatting about tomorrow's sale and the Hero Association's latest dumb idea, and the show they'd watched on TV last night.

When Genos stopped again, Saitama thought another fan had approached.

Instead, Genos was staring at a stage set up nearby. Red banners swirled left and right and overhead, and a big floral heart stood at the back of the stage, whilst on the platform, a pudgy man in a suit gripped a bouquet of flowers and screamed somewhat incoherently into a microphone. The only words Saitama could make out were 'weight gain' and 'love'.

Genos narrowed his eyes, scanning the text on the banner.

_Public Love Confession_?

...that should make things clear enough. To Saitama _and_ those girls.

"Sensei." Genos took a step forward. "Please wait here."

Saitama looked from Genos to the stage, and back again.

He groaned. "Oh man, don't--"

But Genos had already sprinted off, and was talking to a bespectacled woman at a table beside the stage.

Sighing, Saitama trudged closer.

"Yuuri! Japan's parks are so beautiful at night!" A silver-haired foreigner barged past, tugging a rather embarrassed-looking man along with him.

This time, Saitama didn't bother yelling at the guy. He hadn't even understood what the guy had said--for all he knew, the foreigner had said 'excuse me'.

But the dark-haired man with him seemed to be telling him off.

"Victor! Please be careful here. You nearly walked into someone," Yuuri sighed, adjusting his glasses. He always felt awkward in correcting Victor's behaviour, and the thought of causing inconvenience to other people was constantly on his mind whenever they were out. Especially when Victor was like _this_.

"Sorry!" Victor waved at the bald guy, mustering up his best Japanese. "I am sorry!"

Saitama blinked at him, realised the foreigner was drunk, and nodded. "Yeah man, no worries."

Victor was already leading Yuuri closer to the stage. "What's this thing, Yuuri? It looks like fun! Let's watch!"

"We should get back to the hotel..." Yuuri said quietly, turning red. The last thing he wanted was for Victor to catch on to _this_ gimmick.

"Haruhi! What's this commoner's thing?!"

When the boisterous high school student came bouncing along the path this time, Saitama stepped aside.

The students ambled past, a pair of twins snickering to each other whilst the blond led the way. The girl from earlier trailed after the group, a weary look on her face.

Saitama could sympathise. That blond kid looked _annoying_.

"Hey, Haruhi! Look at that guy, he's got robot arms! Isn't that freaky?!"

Saitama retracted his previous thought. That blond kid _was_ annoying.

But before he could speak up, Genos name was announced, and the cyborg stepped onto the stage.

Gut knotting with anxiety, Saitama remembered why they had stopped in the first place.

What was Genos going to say...?

_'Please don't let it be too embarrassing,'_ Saitama thought.

Carefully holding a bouquet of flowers, Genos approached the microphone, seeking Saitama out amidst the crowds.

Saitama cringed when Genos' gaze rested upon him.

Genos paused, gathered his thoughts, then parted his lips and shouted out:

"SAITAMA-SENSEI! THANK YOU FOR TAKING CARE OF ME!"

Saitama let out a sigh of relief. That wasn't too bad. Not even that embarrassing.

"YOUR BALD HEAD IS BEAUTIFUL! SAITAMA-SENSEI, I LOVE YOU!!!"

...now _that_ was embarrassing.

Everybody was looking at him, too.

Saitama stared as Genos stepped away from the microphone. How the hell did the guy stand up there and say that stuff with a straight face?

Genos felt immensely smug as he headed for the stage exit, ushered by a slightly goofy-looking dark-haired guy in a festival yukata. Meanwhile, another guy - long blond hair and a big beaming smile, wearing an identical yukata - introduced the next 'shouter'.

"Next, we have Tamaki Suoh!" The smiling man encouraged applause from bystanders, just as he had done for Genos, and all the other men before them.

"HARUHIIIIIIIIIII!" The high schooler, Tamaki, was on stage before Genos had barely even left it, already screaming down the microphone.

Genos glared.

This _kid_ was louder than him.

"I LOVE YOOOOOOOOU HAAAARUHIIIIIIIIIII!" Takami bellowed into the microphone, arms spread wide as he spoke, an expensive bouquet of flowers clutched in his hand.

From the audience, Saitama looked on as the high-schoolers nudged each other. The lone girl in the group took a step back and began to edge away, glancing behind to make sure the others hadn't noticed.

"Boyfriends are embarrassing, huh?" Saitama said as she passed by. He felt sorry for the kid, being stuck with her noisy boyfriend and his buddies.

"They're _idiots_ ," Haruhi sighed, pausing beside Saitama and looking back at the stage.

Genos had jumped back on, and was now standing beside Tamaki, ignoring the ushers trying to make him leave.

"SAITAMA-SENSEI! I LOVE YOU!" he yelled, louder than before. Louder than the dumb kid.

Tamaki wasn't to be outdone. Taking a deep breath, he shouted as loud as he could.

"HARUHI! I LOVE YOU HARUHIIIIII! MY WIIIIIIFE!"

"...I am not his wife..." Haruhi muttered, drooping a little.

Saitama grinned. "Sounds like a proposal."

"No, he's just like this," the girl sighed.

Up on the stage, Genos glared at Tamaki. He didn't know how the boy had managed to shout louder than him, but there was no way he was going to be outdone.

So he turned back to the audience - to _Saitama_ \- and screamed out at the highest volume his systems would allow.

"SAITAMA-SENSEI! I LOVE YOU FOREVER!"

"HARUHIIII!" yelled Tamaki, alongside him.

"SAITAMA-SENSEI!"

"HARUHIIII!"

"SAITAMA-SENSEI!"  
"HARUHIIII!"

Saitama and Haruhi groaned in unison.

Then a new figure burst onto the stage, flowers in hand and silver hair shining and _stark. Naked._

"YUURI!" Victor trilled, drunkenly pushing past Tamaki and Genos to reach the microphone. "I LOOOVE YOOOOOU, YUURI!"

The two ushers looked on in horror, and rushed onto the stage to cover Victor up.

Victor opened his arms, unaware of them and nearly knocking them aside in his enthusiasm. "YUURI! LET'S GO FOR GOLD TOMORROW! I LOVE YOUUUU!"

"...Maybe Tamaki-senpai isn't too bad..." Haruhi mumbled, cheeks bright red as she averted her eyes from the sight of Victor's lithe, athletic and still very naked form.

Saitama laughed. "Yeah. And Genos is... _incredible,_ really." He looked up at the stage, where Genos stood glaring stonily at the drunk foreigner. Saitama smiled, a warm glow filling in his chest. Genos was great. Really great. And he loved him enough to go shout it out from a stage like some kind of idiot.

They needed to go on dates more often. The guy deserved it.

A little ahead of them, Yuuri stared at Victor in shock. He'd looked away for just _five minutes_ to check a message from Phichit, and the next thing he knew Victor was up there, shouting out, and for some reason naked.

What was it with Victor and nudity?

Was it a Russian thing?

Yuuri didn't get it.

All he knew was that he really, _really_ wished the ground would swallow him up right now.

Particularly as he could overhear other bystanders talking about him.

"Isn't that Victor Nikiforov?"

"It _is!_ Oh gosh! The rumours about Yuuri Katsuki must be true!"

"...isn't _that_ Yuuri Katsuki?"

Horrified, Yuuri edged backwards, only to collide with Haruhi. "Ah, I'm sorry!" He bowed quickly, noticing her red cheeks and embarrassed expression. Then he noticed Saitama, and remembered him from before.

"I-I'm so sorry about my boyf--, uh, my coach..." he said, eyes darting. Something about this bald man seemed immeasurably powerful, and Yuuri really didn't want to cause any trouble.

Saitama shrugged. "He loves you, man. Though it looks like he's getting arrested."

Yuuri glanced at the stage and let out a little shriek of horror when he saw the police manhandling Victor away.

Forgetting the pair he was apologising to, Yuuri raced off, still wishing the ground would swallow him up.

Tamaki and Genos were leaving the stage now, the ushers having them exit on separate sides to avoid another love-shouting match.

Seeing that Genos had been waylaid by a film crew who had appeared out of nowhere, Saitama sighed. After this, they were _definitely_ leaving the park. As fast as possible.

"Haruhi? Where are you, Haruhi?" Tamaki had reached his group of friends, and upon realising that she wasn't among them, was looking around in confusion.

Saitama glanced at Haruhi and grinned. "Good luck, kid."

"You too," Haruhi bowed, and hurried off before Tamaki could cause any more uproar.

Saitama watched her catch up with her boyfriend, and couldn't help but smile at their exchange.

"Haruhi!"

"Senpai."

"You're wonderful, my Haruhi!" Tamaki threw his arms around her, pulling her into a crushing hug.

Frowning, Haruhi pushed him away. "You're an embarrassment. Don't do things like that in public!"

Tamaki pouted. Hadn't Haruhi liked his public confession of love? He looked down at the flowers - ridiculously cheap, really, he could order far better from elsewhere - and then smiled at Haruhi with his best, most princely expression.

"I thought your mother would like these," he said honestly, finally offering the bouquet.

"Tamaki-senpai..." Haruhi's irritation faded as she let Tamaki place the bouquet into her hands. She could set these beside her mother's picture in the shrine at home. Tamaki wasn't completely stupid, after all.

So when he stepped forward and drew her into a somewhat gentler, more tentative hug, she allowed it (pulling the flowers out of the way just in time to save them getting crushed) and hugged back.

Saitama grinned. The teens made a cute couple...

Looking back to where he'd last seen Genos, he saw that the cyborg was still being interviewed by a rather persistent journalist.

Saitama wandered over.

"Did you not hear me? I love Saitama-sensei. He's the most incredible hero," Genos was telling her, a scowl upon his face that was cute despite the fact it meant he was close to losing his temper.

"Of course you have admiration for your sensei, but what about a girlfriend?"

"I _told_ you, I love Saitama-sensei," Genos reiterated. Spying Saitama behind the film crew, he barged through them, bowing low as he held out the bouquet (which was now a little squashed from how tightly Genos had gripped it).

"Saitama-sensei. I love you. Please continue to be mine."

"Uh...I--you too, you know?" Saitama accepted the flowers, blushing deeply when he realised the cameras were trained on him. "We're kinda...getting an audience here, Genos..." he mumbled, looking at the flowers because they were the least embarrassing thing to focus on.

Then he saw the price tag.

"Genos..."

"Sensei?"

"These--" Saitama stopped and scowled at the cameras, then pulled Genos away. He didn't want to be filmed.

The film crew started to follow.

"My sensei wants privacy!" Genos snapped at them.

When they didn't seem prepared to leave them alone, he raised one hand, his entire arm starting to glow as his palm cannon prepared to fire.

The crew very rapidly decided they had more interesting things to film.

Relieved, Saitama dragged Genos away, shock at the price tag starting to fade.

_How_ many zeroes had it been?

When they stopped, some distance from the crowd, Saitama glanced at the price tag once more, and the shock came back all over again.

"Genos!" he stared at his boyfriend. "What the hell were you thinking?"

"I wanted to declare my love for you, sensei."

"The flowers, man!" Saitama interrupted, tapping the price tag. "This is like, a week's grocery shopping! _Two_ week's!"

Genos raised his brows. "I used my own money, sensei."

"Just tell me you didn't pay the full price. This is extortionate for a bunch of--"

"You're worth it."

Saitama stopped mid-rant, brown eyes locking onto Genos' yellow.

Genos looked back at him with nothing more than pure, sincere adoration in his gaze (okay, and maybe a little hurt that he'd been chastised, which in turn made Saitama feel a little guilty).

"I love you, Saitama-sensei," Genos said quietly.

"I...Yeah," Saitama let out a sigh, looking at the flowers. They were pretty fancy. Nice, really. "You too, y'know," he mumbled. "I do. Love you too." Clearing his throat, Saitama took Genos' hand in his. "Let's go home. Gotta put these in some water."

Genos grinned. "Yes, sensei!"

They headed off along the path, Genos' smile more than a little smug.

He loved Saitama, and he'd just told the entire city.

Next stop, the world.

 

As the ushers cleaned up at the end of the evening, they reflected on the madness that had unfolded on tonight's stage.

"Well," said the brunette. "That was...fun."

The blond laughed. "There were some cute love proclamations."

"Next year, let's just run a dance class or something."

"Now _there's_ an idea I can get behind..."

**Author's Note:**

> P.S. The 'ushers' are cameo appearances of a certain two guys unrelated to the other fandoms, put in for Deme's enjoyment :D


End file.
